


Take the World

by cotton2something (evergreen_melancholy)



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Character Study, Coping, FIFA World Cup 2014, FIFA World Cup 2018, Gen, German National Team, Götzeus if you squint, Loss, Marco didn't deserve that, Written to help me cope with the loss against SK
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2018-06-29
Packaged: 2019-05-30 07:13:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15091751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/evergreen_melancholy/pseuds/cotton2something
Summary: Is this the life, the one you imagined? Is this the life, the one from your dreams?Marco remembers the roaring audience when they win against Sweden—the renewed cheers when he equalizes, the awe when Toni scores the winning goal, the exhilaration when they secure their win (and safety in the group stage.) He feels the reassuring soreness in his bones, the relief at not being injured, and thinks that maybe this time, it won’t be like 2014.Five days later, Marco cups his face in his hands, heart suffering not from injury, but from defeat. He was right in that it wasn’t going to be like 2014.





	Take the World

_Is this the life, the one you imagined? Is this the life, the one from your dreams?_

\--

Marco remembers the roaring audience when they win against Sweden—the renewed cheers when he equalizes, the awe when Toni scores the winning goal, the exhilaration when they secure their win (and safety in the group stage.) He feels the reassuring soreness in his bones, the relief at not being injured, and thinks that maybe this time, it won’t be like 2014. Despite being happy that his teammates won the World Cup in the end (and even happier when Mario held up his jersey after the match), there’s still a bitter taste in his mouth that will never go away. His proneness to injury stays there, nestled within the back of his mind, forever taunting him about missed matches and even more missed chances. What hurt the most was that the team didn’t even need him to win—he sometimes (often) wonders what would happen if he played matches in 2014, and thinks about 7-1 being 10-1 and celebrating goals with Mario. 2014 seems like a faraway place now, and with 4 years in between, everything Marco’s ever known still faces the heartless exposure to time. It’s four years later and Mario’s back with him and Dortmund, but it’s four years later and Mats is at Bayern, Pierre is at Arsenal, and despite having both André and Mario by his side, Marco still feels empty. Robert playing for Bayern still gives him a slight pang in his chest, and seeing his old friend fall into the ego-development trap of the football world doesn’t make it any easier to not miss the times when they were at the top of the world in both football and friendship.

 

2018 is not like 2014—Marco knows that better than anyone. This time, Mario’s the one who’s left behind, but he’s halfway to Russia when he realizes that even Andre isn’t with him. It feels different seeing the number 19 worn by a different person and he frowns when he remembers that it must be hard for Thomas to see the number 11 worn by a different person as well. At least Miro’s with them in Russia. He closes his eyes and thinks about Per, Lukas, Basti, Miro, and Philipp—it’s not the same without them and it probably will never be the same, not with the buzzing new blood of Leroy and the (many) new Julians that Marco still needs to come up with a way to differentiate between. He sometimes wonders where the point is in going for such a title if four years later they’ll give it up again. Time is a cruel enemy, and he wonders if this will be the only World Cup he ever plays in.

\--

It’s June 16th and they’ve just lost against Mexico. The first match started roughly, drained him of his emotions, and he curses to himself for feeling like that when he didn’t even play a full match. He throws his jersey over his head and begins thinking about the match against Sweden. As long as his body still works, he’ll give it to football.

 

It’s June 23rd and they’ve just won against Sweden. He’s built up hope that they’re still in it, still there, still fighting for something. Mario calls him that night to congratulate him on his goal and he ignores the tightness in his chest when they slip into easy conversation like before. It’s still there when he tells Mario that it’s not the same and it’s still there when Mario tells him that he misses him—misses them.

 

It’s June 28th and they’ve just lost against South Korea. With a goal in stoppage time that cruelly mirrors their victory on Sweden (and another goal that ends up in the back of the net without Manu being there to stop it), Marco contemplates the sound of the crowd in comparison to their victory to Sweden. He still hears the roars, the awe, the exhilaration, except this time it’s of another frequency (and for another country.)

 

He can’t look anyone in the eye as he slumps back to the bench. The tightness in his chest is back and the tears caress the edges of his eyes, budding over his lashes but refusing to fall. He sits in a heavy silence that weighs even more than the loss at hand, and it’s only when he sees Thomas in the corner of his eye that he realizes that he can no longer hear the crowd.

 

He was right in that it wasn’t going to be like 2014.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This was written after Germany lost to South Korea during their last match of the group stage. I was heartbroken and wanted to write something that would reflect how I would feel if I were in Marco's place. Saw pictures of him and Thomas on the bench, Marco with his head in his hands and I just had to express my feelings somehow. Title and opening sentence taken from 'Take the World' by She Wants Revenge.


End file.
